Listen to God

 Throughout my life, I have taken my own decisions and used them, instead of listening to and knowing that God was in charge of everything. It never went well. God protected me, keeping me safe through my ignorance.

Our body hurts as we grow older. Sometimes that pain is excruciating, sometimes because we will abuse our then young bodies. Oh, how stupid.

Basically, listen to..

multiple injuries

Your joints. We watch sports, some of which can be violently impacted and others are seemingly mild.   Have you watched how crazy some injuries are related to impact sports? Did you know that rodeo has the most horrible injuries? 

Probably the most dangerous sport ever

 Most people can't see the injuries of golf.  It is silent to enthusiasts, but do not see until a
player needs surgery on
every joint.

 

Your brain: There may be minor things, like your keys, but then that becomes bigger. It is so gradual until life shows that there is more going on. And then. Of the things of the list, this one I fear the most.

Your pain: Sounds odd, but it isn't. Diabetes, 
heart, kidneys, you name it. Watch those symptoms. Don't ignore them "Oh, it's just a twinge, just a pain, just a...And then. (Men are notorious for this.)

 

Merry Christmas, one and all.

  
We live in a community where all of the above are present. At a recent gathering, many elderly semi-joked about their entertainment is going from doctor to another, on the same day. "It's like a cheap date." Everyone nodded in understanding.

Things happen

source

Things happen.  Things happen quickly.

In one second, a fraction of second,

one’s world changes,

 turns over.

Maybe it is a fall.  Or, maybe it is abrupt darkness or 

pain,

But then, things happen.

Courage Begins Here

Source

Quick!  You can do it!

James heard Dan’s voice.  He trusted his friend and followed him blindly.  Whatever Dan said was the law.

Dan shifted from foot to foot, his breath coming out quickly.

  “Come on!  We gotta go!  Just do it!”  Dan watched as the backs of the pack of boys disappeared around the corner.

Source: Allen West Republic

James hesitated.  He heard Dan hiss, “Coward!”

James stared up into Dan’s eyes.  Without breaking contact or even blinking, James took the loosened edge of the band aid.

Rip!

We all been there.

Roses into Darkness

The Garden in April 2014 

Gary pulled rough work gloves, enjoying smells of dirt from previous gardening ventures.  Between Gary and Kelly, the roses had been pruned, now bursting in color.  Gary reveled in scented beauty.

Oranges by June, Gary smiled.  Kelly will love that.

But, last week’s wind storm had almost destroyed the lemon tree.  Dang!  If only I had cut off some branches, or picked off older lemons…then…I

Pain burst in his head.  Behind his eyes an aura obliterated the roses.  Star bursts, quavering lines.

Source: sailinjohn

Gary crawled inside, calling  “Kelly!”

 Sadly, Kelly guided Gary. Another dark room day.

Wednesday Words: Ephemeral

xymonau: Dez Pain

As the raging migraine hit, Maura sat with her head over a bucket.  When the nausea retreated, an inexplicable ephemeral euphoria descended over her. 

The scurrilous and reprehensible pigpen-scent that had been part of her 
accursed life receded,  Maura was left with an unidentified sense of 
petulant-less peace and lack of pain.  The air was at once free of smell.


Well.  I wonder how long this will last?

Many thanks to Delores at Under the Porch Light.  She tosses out six words faithfully to any who would participate in the Wednesday Words.  Please click on the stream in the right bar to access her site, complete with a list of participants.  Delores is awesome; I hope to meet her someday.

Oh, the photo above is by Dez Pain/xymonau at Free Stock Photos: Rgbstock.  The photo is what I see in my head when I have a migraine.  Sometimes the colors are purple and blue.  Please check out the photo site--talent there to be found.

Made sharp by Faith

Front: Robert, Mary, Mom and Dad; Back: Susan, Bill, and Don   about 1967...oh, the hair-do's of the day...

Originally, the family had five children, who became five adults.  Once a year a few of them would manage to meet together from the reaches of Pacific to Atlantic.  Robert was the stalwart lynch pin who lived near the "folks", told the stories, and looked forward when the others returned.

Then Robert died, at age 46.

"Coming home" was now a different matter.  The siblings felt the absence of this brother.  

There was one who never came home; never--well, seldom.  Once in ten years, and then another time a few years later.  That was Bill.

When Bill died, there were only three left: Donald (the eldest and now only brother), Susan (the pushy middle child) and Mary (the youngest and most stubborn).  Don was the one who helped Robert in his last days, since he lived only 90 miles away.  He helped the folks in their grieving.  He flew to Louisiana to bring Bill "home" to be buried.

When our mother was dying, Don was there almost every day, holding her hand, taking care of her wishes.

Don is now the lynch pin.  This is what he recently wrote to me, and he has given me permission to publish it.  God bless this man, my oldest brother, my friend.

Sis,

Had an emotional day which started three weeks ago with (grandson) Aaron’s confirmation service.  If you saw my Facebook entry, there is a picture of Aaron kneeling at an altar wearing a stole he made in the course of class activities.  His pastors have their hands on him, and he is surrounded by his mom and dad.  What a moment; they call on God to bless Aaron in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

Grandson Aaron

I worship with them after my (ministerial) time at Loami Church.  I constantly hear from my friends of the contributions of Jeremy and his family to the community of faith.  One senior citizen told me of a conversation with Aaron, which was closed with Aaron saying, “I will pray for you”.  Jeremy plays his trumpet in the praise band.  During the sermon he sits with me.  This is no play-acting, but real discipleship is lived out in their lives.

Three weeks ago I wrenched my back at the lumbar 5 and 6.  This time was the worst pain I have ever felt.  I got meds for pain and still went to the hospital for relief.

I became depressed.  Every move hurt.  Muscles spasms kept relief at bay.

I suffered through our Loami Church breakfast, only to have a slight mishap on the way to the platform.  A church member helped and moved a chair to the center of the platform from which I led the service.  After my concluding blessing, a member gathered everyone to the front and then “laid hands” on me, with voice supplications for healing.  What a moment!

So I went straight home, and with an hour to kill, I read your blogs.

Your description of grief over our brother Bill, and the consolation offered by your granddaughter really overwhelmed me.  All I have experienced in the last month was felt in that verbal visual of a child holding you until you feel better.

We wonder why we suffer, and theology gives me the answer.  The difference between being a victim or a victor is defined in the moments you and I have shared on this page.  Somewhere in the experience is an awareness of LOVE, ill-defined by language, theology, or any human description.  But it is made sharp by faith: we have seen the face of God.

Don

The Lynch Pin

Delores at myfeatherednest posted some Wednesday Words yesterday.  I wrote something in the comment section, and felt silly afterwords.  The words deserved something more, which Delores wrote today.  Simply lovely.

That in mind, I wrote this today.  Hopefully, it will be better.

Source

Richard ran his fingers lightly along the piano, willing himself to ignore the pain in fragile arthritic fingers.  Had it been so long ago? 

Peeling away the memories of hours spent in solitude at this piano, Richard recalled the joy, the utter joy at playing such a magnificent piano.  

Genius…that was what they called me, then.

The first chord sounded and Richard willed his hands to play the classics once more.

Band Aid Courage

We have all been here.  Go to See*Photo*Write

Quick!  You can do it!

James heard Dan’s voice.  He trusted his friend and followed him blindly.  Whatever Dan said was the law.

Dan shifted from foot to foot, his breath coming out quickly.  “Come on!  We gotta go!  Just do it!”  Dan watched as the backs of his pack of boys disappeared around the corner.

James hesitated.  He heard Dan hiss, “Coward!”

James stared up into Dan’s eyes.  Without breaking contact or even blinking, James grasped the loosened edge of the band aid.

The Broken Heart(s)

Broken Heart(s

I was alone when I lost the baby. 

I didn’t know for sure that I was pregnant, although I had purchased two home pregnancy testing kits.  The first one said “NO”.

 I was saving the second test for another week.  Back then those tests were not as refined, as precise.

But, I was alone.  My husband and two children were visiting his brother and family.  There was to be a ham dinner, and we were there when I became sick with what I thought was the flu. 

John brought me home, left me there, and went back to his brother’s house.  I didn’t see any need for him to stay home with me.

I had stretched out on the sofa, with a ‘throw-up’ bowl just in case.  The cramps in my abdomen would come and go. 

I know what you’re thinking: why didn’t I recognize the cramps as contractions. 

Both of my children had been delivered by C-section.

After a few hours, I was in such pain, and headed to the bathroom.

You know what came next.  Male or female, no descriptions need to be given.

After all was done, I crept into my bed with a heating pad to home against my empty womb.

I was two minds about the miscarriage.  I started mourning for the baby I would never get to hold.  Yet, I was also glad I wasn’t pregnant, because my son was only 10 months old.

Most of all, I was broken hearted.

I curled up in a ball with the heating pad and a box of tissues.

I started crying. 

Susan Kane

24 February 2011  http://itsinthebookde.blogspot.com