My Hometown

T racy Chapman and Bruce Springsteen "My hometown"

 It is July and harvesting is stirring things up in Pike County Illinois. Tractors are on the road; pickers are going down rows to collect the summer's corn.  Hay balers are out in the sun, stacking bales, and sweating up a storm.

My mother always spread a table of sweet corn, meat loaf, mashed potatoes, tons of foods.  And then, she laid out her pies.  Four pies?  I don't know.  I was the bus boy, the dishwasher, and the general cleaner.

What wonderful memories.

                                        Crosby, Stills, and Nash  1970s

 Our home.  Our house, Our hometown. Even though we have grown, moved on, have our own house those videos are in my mind.

 Jason Aldean   Try that in a small town.

 I grew up on a farm surrounded by corn fields, and a smattering of small towns. Without a doubt, every farm has at least a double barrel shotgun, a rifle, and maybe a handgun. Wild animals and wild dogs roamed and attacked livestock throughout the year, even a farmwife could stand with the farmers.

I once joked that if the BLM came rolling to our town, there would be roads of tractors and trucks blocking every entrance. On those and on buildings throughout the business town there would be hunting rifles in the hands of farmers. 

Now, I have no jokes about this being cast as offensive, "Try that in a small town".

See what you think.  I am curious. 

 

End of the Line

 

                                                                The never-ending line.

The cartoon strips above can be enlarged.

There are many versions of our struggle to continue. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

Narrator: Throughout the millenia of human history, religions have arisen from the divine to the diabolical. Their tenets have offered hope, meaning, and guidance to the faithful.


Luna Pedestrian 2: But, what if waiting in this line has no meaning? What if it's all for naught?


Queue Church Priest: Lift up your head and be of good cheer, neighbor. For I say unto you that we are all in this line together, and even as we speak, souls at the head of the queue are being blessed by attendance at the Great Bar of Judgement and License Renewal!


Sign: Stay the Course


Luna Pedestrian 2: But the line is so long! How much longer do we have to wait?


Narrator: Not many license agencies can boast lines long enough to spawn religions. Count your blessings, fair reader.


Sign: Queue-Jumping is a SIN


Queue Church Priest: Some wait longer than others, and some do not stay the course.


Luna Pedestrian 2: You mean they get out of LINE?


Queue Church Priest: They do. And their places are lost forever. They may repent, however, and return to the end of the line.


Queue Church Priest: From such we learn the importance of staying on the straight and narrow queue. Those who go astray may still be saved, but their path back is longer and more arduous than that of the righteous!


Sign: No butts No cuts No coconuts


Queue Church Priest: And now, my child, I think you should learn of the prophecy of the chosen ones. We have been taught that someday there will be a great battle, and that afterward gleaming saviors will bring us all to the Bar of Judgement and License Renewal at once.


Sign: Placard courtesy of "Signs of the Times"


Luna Pedestrian 2: But when will this happen? How long must we wait for these saviors?


Queue Church Priest: I doubt they will come in my lifetime, but still I keep the faith.


Sign: The end is near.


Shep: Awright, people, listen up! The line is being shunted that way. We'll get you all cleared out in a few hours, but you've gotta move.


Queue Church Priest: Oh, rapture! I can see people receiving licenses even now!


Luna Pedestrian 2: Well, thanks for the nice lecture. I'll be moving along now, old man.


Sign: This space for rent


Narrator: Some religions last longer than others.

I heard this story long ago but was reminded of it when watching the lines and lines of people going to the San Diego Comic Festival.  Want to talk about lines? Standing in line with anime characters Luna, Artemis or Himawari, movie characters Groot, and Thor is always interesting, but I feel underdressed. Thor was nice, though. Let me hold his hammer.

How hot is it?

 

The exhibition celebrates the history of an old candle making factory which was based on Bankside more than 100 years ago  

It is July 21 and the day will be roasting hot by noon. Temperatures of our area may reach 108 deg. today. 

Just when the inside feels like I could bake cookies on the counter, a magical thing happens.

Source: livia-maria

Our local energy company SDG & E electric employs the FLEX energy plan to keep the electrical grids from overloading.  That means they can turn my A/C off.  Off!! with the fan still running. 

Source

Off, with the interior thermometer rising slowly up the scale.  82º?  That is nothing.  86º, and it keeps rising.  I stop looking.

Outside?  Thermometer past 95 and still going...

The A/C returned.  God bless it.

Truth is: Summer makes me cranky.  Life sucks.  Leave me alone.

This is a re-post from 2020 or 2014 or 2013.  It doesn't matter; hot one year or the other doesn't matter.

Going up the Mountain

 

 

Bell Mountain, Victorville, California

These people had been covered by the news, but it was fuzzy back in late 1970s.  This event was in Victorville, California, where a group of interesting people climbed off a bus and boarded cars and trucks.

They carried identical cheap suitcases and rolled up blankets.  They were dazed and confused, but that changed when some man appeared, walking up a rocky path to meet them.

They were thrilled, became animated, and were ready to go. Dancing and rejoicing faded away as vehicles drove along that road from which the leader had come.

The leader was hard to describe, and newspaper photos were gray and hazy. But he led them up the mountain, off into the fading light. 

One day, then two days, and finally three days later, there was silence on the hill. And then, oh boy, they trudged through our town and settled into the Home Depot parking lot.

These were the same eager travelers who had journeyed up the mountain all happy. Wrapped up in their matching blankets, not one of them looked around until a man walked by, giving me a hopeless, almost angry, look. 

“They was s’pposed to come and get us.  We waited, and they didn’t come.”

Apparently, the cult prophet had gathered believers and called them to this holy mountain where they would be when the world ended.  Space Aliens were to pick them up? Take them where?

We never knew.  They were given some donations to buy food and bus tickets. They disappeared to their own homes where they had sold all their worldly goods, giving the money to their revered cult leader.  He needed to fund their journey.

Home Depot was busy that night.

Hand of the Law

 

Samuel stared through the bars as he groaned at this unjust incarceration.  What had he done?  Just the usual stuff, but this time?  I got caught big time.

He coughed up a ball of green-yellow phlegm, spitting it on the floor beyond the bars.  Heh, heh, heh… Samuel had been charged with disturbing the peace, marking graffiti on public walls, and destruction of property.

That last one gave him joy.  With just a plastic knife, Samuel had stabbed a piece of furniture, tossing foam and stuffing everywhere.  Good times.

Samuel then realized that his diaper was beyond damp, it was dripping.  “MAMA!” he cried, with big tears.  Sometimes being the not-yet-potty-trained was a blessing.

This is from 2014 (Nine years?) and the underlined words are from Delores who set up a writing challenge for every writer, Wednesday Words. Delores retired from this and handed it over to some very talented bloggers Drifting through life  and Elephant's Child. Please head on over to those sites, and see what other bloggers are creating.

Think, questions without answers

There are many timeless questions that each person asks of himself:

Who am I?

 

Why am I here?

 

Who is God?

 

Why do bad things happen to good people?

 

How was the world created?

 

What happened to the dinosaurs?

 

What do I do if there is a catastrophic event?

 

Why does money exist?

 

Who really is in charge of this _____?

Obviously this list could get pretty long.  I once considered these questions vital and important.  Once I turned my life over to God, the big questions became small and unimportant. God had it all covered.

However, I am concerned about other things, and have created a new list:

Where did I park the car?

By the way, where are the car keys?

 

Did I close the garage door?

 

What is the expiration date on _____?

 

What is that person’s name—the one approaching me with a big smile?

 

Where is the next exit off the freeway?

 

Where is the closest bathroom?

I mean it, where is the closest bathroom?

 

What is the price of this___?  The print is too small.

These are pretty basic questions, I’ll give you that.

But, they matter to me.

 

I suspect there are many readers who could add to this list.

Any other questions you would suggest?

 

This is a repost from 2011.  Sometimes when I look back at some old posts, I have two thoughts: Dang! That's pretty good and What was I thinking? Do you ever do that?

 

Be Free, my Friend.

 

Thanks Pam and Dawn! See*Photo*Write

 

Heavy rain pelted the door and Samuel coughed.  It was a wet cough followed by yellow goo from his nose.  Misery was running high.

The Mommy had cleaned him up, wiping his nose again.  ‘Just let it flow, woman!’  Samuel had already found the sofa and chairs useful enough. 

The doorbell rang, and Aunt Tammy came whooshing through the door.  An irritatingly cheerful woman, “Oh, whittle Sammie Whammy has duh sniffuls?” as she scooped him up.  “Oh, who’s duh cutest…” 

Samuel let loose with a full-bodied sneeze right into her open mouth.  ‘Just for you, Tammy Whammy!’

The Mommy carried in a gift from Tammy’s car:  a round fish bowl with a deep-red fish swirling around, its fins fluttering in clear water.  Setting it on the table, she wiped Samuel’s nose again and took him from the retching Aunt Tammy.

Putting Samuel down by the table, the Mommy called, “Here’s some tea!”  Tammy stumbled, retching all the way to the kitchen, leaving Samuel.  Eye level with the fish bowl, Samuel considered it.

Ginger-the-old-fat-tabby appeared on a chair next to Samuel.  Their eyes met, thoughts were exchanged, and challenges made.  Who is faster?  Who is better?  Who will win this battle?

Samuel saw only one way. Giving it his all, Samuel screamed and cried, “Whaaaa!  Mommmmmmammmmmmaaa…”

The Mommy came, saw the crying child pointing at the cat, and grabbed the Ginger.  She scolded the old cat all the way to the front door.  Ginger and Samuel exchanged looks.  ‘So this is the way it is to be,’ Ginger glared through slitted eyes.

Time enough.  Just time enough.  Samuel grabbed the fish bowl between snotty hands, pulling it to the edge.  ‘Be free, my friend.  Be free.’  The bowl dropped.

A post from 2011. I had written several posts about Samuel. We all know some boy like Samuel.

 

Adam knows everything, and it is creepy

 

A rant is long overdue, so bear with me.

Internet security has always been an issue, and this issue becomes blaring when it affects millions of people worldwide.  This is not just occasional, but as one of many hacking invasions.

My daughter introduced me to "Adam Ruins...", a YouTube series where an incredible revelations about a variety of a broad scary vulnerabilities in today's societies. (While "Adam Ruins..." may or may not totally truthful, this one certainly must be.)

Here is one scary video that is applicable to my rant:

This is 6:20 in time, but well worth the watch.

For instance, I had searched some sites to find a dress or something for my son's wedding.  Since then I have been inundated on Gmail, Blogspot and Facebook sidebars for outfits that may be of interest. Motorcycle parts? NextMD for migraines? IQ tests? (I am brilliant, a genius, by the way.)

Basically we live in a world where privacy is a rare, non-existent luxury. Even "going off the grid" is still not a guarantee.

Not much of a rant, but this is certainly one of outrage, anger, and most of all: fear.

I hope that this is accessible!  If not, paste "Adam ruins + YouTube" in your search.

This is a re-post from 2017. 

Life is too short to---

 

Living in a retirement community means seeing the constant rotation of old residents being replaced by new residents.  For the old, most of them are in their 80s to over 100. Seeing smiling happy bingo players on a Friday becomes hearing about their deaths on Saturday.

It is time, time to realize your bucket list or any list should not be delayed.  That said, here is some of my list:

Life is too short to...

Order the cheapest entree on the menu.

 

Buy and eat store-made sushi.

Sleep on an old mattress.

Use duct tape to fix the same thing over and over.

Be ignorant of history. Knowing the past 
changes how you understand the present.

Be mean. You will regret this
all your life.

Stay silent when speaking out will help people
or situations.

Avoid puddles when walking. Splash in them, dang it.

 

Stay inside at sunset. God created them, they are amazing.

Put off sorting through the boxes of photos in your closet.
They are not going away. Having your heirs do this is
embarrassing.

Watch TV all the time, regardless
what is on.

 

Make judgments about people.

Eat stale bread. Bread is God's gift.

Gossip. Truth will out. 

Purchase absolutely the least expensive, most awful toilet paper.

Rage at and curse the TV.

 

Give up on someone. 

 

Drink cheap wine.

this is from Calliers Chocolate factory in Switzerland. You have no idea.

Consume poor quality chocolate (go for the good stuff, like from Switzerland).

Avoid saying "I'm sorry".
 

Behave angrily and irrationally.

Be too proud to ask forgiveness.

 

Buy store-bought pie. I am a pie snob.

Be serious all the time.

 

Discount power of prayer.

Make plans to do something or go somewhere, but then don't do it.

 

Wear cheap shoes.

Eat an ice cream whose flavor you hate 
for some strange reason. 

Neglect friends or family.

 

Be serious all the time.

Forget what it was like to be a child.

Suppress a giggle. 

This list could go on and on. Don't you have a list of your own?  

 

What is it? What should you do about it?

 

This was written a few years ago.  I have edited it.  The list has grown longer.

 

 

 

 

 

Cow Dung Takes Flight

 

You absolutely have to check this site. I mean it.

 

Well, it is that time of the year: Chatham Jaycees Annual Sweet Corn and Cow Chipping Festival in Illinois.

Small communities like Chatham are gems. Generations gather to renew friendships and celebrate history.  While there are competitions of all sorts, nothing, but nothing, is as intense and delightful as the Cow Chipping Contest.

The whole process is fairly simple. From their cow pastures, farmers select dried cow pies of the correct size, using a toilet seat as the measuring standard. The pies are then donated to the Jaycees where they are kept in a secure place. I am not kidding.

(There have been some accusations about sabotage; pies have been embedded with pellets or such in the past.  So, security is provided. Yes, it is.) 

Future chippers--not afraid to get their hands dirty

"This event will take place on July 21-23 at the Chatham sports field. Any attendees wishing to participate in the cow chipping throw should attend when the event is announced.  Experience is not necessary. All should understand that participation may result in pungent particulates adhering to hands and clothing."

This is a quote from 2019 flyers.

Competition is serious business.

Beaver, OK, where cows outnumber people, 16-1

This is an international sport. Visitors travel to participate in this event.

Pinterest.com

 When I was there a few years ago, the Jaycees had an emergency: the farmer who provided cow pies in the past had sold half his herd.  My brother Rev. Don Peck and his son Jeremy (president of the Chatham Jaycees) contacted other locals. They know everyone in the community, and within 15 minutes all was resolved.

Community.

This was published 2019 originally. I just was notified that the Chatham Sweet Corn festival is next week. Can't show off my chipping skills.  Oh, I brought home a heavily shellacked patty and put it by the roses. Over the 4 years, it has wasted away.

 

Grandee Alice

Wow

 

When Grandee Alice died, her grandchildren were devastated by her loss.

Annie and Jack had walked the countryside with Grandee, where she led them along the landscape. Annie held Grandee’s hand, feeling her fingers brush along the sage bushes that littered the fields. Jack gasped after seeing a rainbow.

The sun was into the dusky night. They headed back to Grandee’s farmhouse where she brought slices of watermelon to the porch, juice soon running down faces. Grandee looked off to the farm. Resilience was part of her life, what she left behind was in Annie and Jack’s hands. 

 

Gazing at them, she drank in the art of God’s creations.

 

These underlined words are Wed. Words from June 28. The complete list of words and other comments in Elephant's Child . Please head over there to see what other bloggers have written with this collection of unrelated words!