Different skillsets for different people

 

 Ludlow Castle. Shropshire, England

When Will and Bobbie got a letter informing them that they had been accepted to be part of “Life in a Castle” for 6 months to learn and manage the reality of life in a castle, well, they were beyond excited. 

Apparently, they had skills that would prove useful for the care of a huge old castle in Ludlum, England. Will had won Forged in Fire episode where he won $10,000 for making an outstanding sword.

Bobbie’s special skill was not really evident. His dad owned a company that installed septic systems for excrement disposal. On his dad’s advice, Bobbie wrote that he was a manager of “Septic System R Us”.

They found themselves in the bailey with a large crew surrounded by forests leading to bog land, a variation of villages and fields around them.   Will was led to the stables where he would prove his skills making metal objects. No problem, he would do just fine.

Bobbie, on the other hand, was taken to the part of the Castle called the “garderobe”. He thought he would be a guard of a robe, some sort of clothing. He strutted proudly to the area, where his skills could be used.

When the group reached the side where the “garderobe” was, it was explained what it was. Bobbie looked up at the part at the top of the castle where the occupants used the garderobe as a toilet and deposited excrement to fall all at the bottom of the wall. Workers then shoveled the poop into a wagon to take to the fields beyond. 

Bobbie shook his head, sighing heavily, looking at a pile of excrement recently dropped from the toilet “Poop follows me wherever I go. Dad would be so proud.”

 ***What is a garderobe? Look here: https://share.google/2rGf5I3qoK0TRZg1b

Wed Words, 6-5-26 can be found at River, where other bloggers are challenged to use 6-12 words and write for fun. Go there and post your own take on the words:

1.sculpture  2.amendment  3.timeline  4.bog  5.castle

and/or:

1.sword  2.crew  3.buffalo  4.forest  5.variation

 

I am tired, oh so tired.

 

 

I, Daniel Ester, am tired. These are my thoughts after five years of studying something that is apparently useless and unnecessary to one's existence.

I am tired of wallowing in a life that swirls  around on a figurative spindle with no results.

I am tired of smelling smoke of bratwurst wafting from that neighbor who lives just below my apartment. Can't he grill a steak now and then.

I am tired of blaring music from another neighbor above me from Trinidad.

I am tired of big boob blonde neighbor across the hall, who parades around in the courtyard, wearing her latest purchases from Victoria's Secret.  Actually, I don't mind that part at all, being a red-blooded American male with a strong libido.

I am tired of that toothless codger with knobby knees on first floor apartment ogling the blonde as she struts around applying sunscreen.

Dammit, I am just plain tired of it all.  

 In fact, I may move out of Mom's basement when graduation comes for me to get my degree in historical studies, with a focus on ancient Sumerian society...   

...like that is going to get me a job, that comes with a paycheck?  But I hear Lowe's is hiring someone who can read stuff and follow directions.  I can handle that, I think.  

 

 

The underlined words are Wednesday Words from 2016. The Wed. Words are the creation of a now retired blogger named Delores. She handed this writing off to other bloggers when her computer gave up. The new finder-of-words is River and she has a creative mind... 

Do pop over to her site and join the Wed. Word Challenges.  

I often go back to previously posted blogs.  These are always re-written and changed because I have changed as a writer. So if you shrug off my posts, please grant me a pass. I have been diagnosed with Parkinson's and my hands are fighting my fingers.   

All things must come to an end.

 

 Oh, to be dancing.

 

“This vegetarian lifestyle really sucks,” Dina sighed, tugging at the weeds surrounding peas, tomatoes, and beans.

Dewy leaves now were dried in mid-day sun. Dina stretched and arched her back, standing to look around fields. People and friends just like her hard at work on summer harvest.  What life had been when all of this began…

Oh the times Dina relished when she had whirled around nightly fires, sparks rising up into a black sky.  Fairies had danced upon her fingertips and elves had woven rainbows through her hair. Dina had laughed, swirling and loving all in a colorful world.

Now hippy life and love appeared less and less meaningful after three years. The world now was black and white, the fires less, and fairies gone.  Dropping the clumps of weeds to the ground, Dina strode along the damp earth thinking...

All things must come to an end.

 

 

 

This a Wednesday Word post written in 2014. The underlined words were tossed out for writers to broaden their stories. This challenge was created by a fellow blogger Delores about 1o years or so. She passed the baton onto other bloggers.

 

 

 Go to -driftingthroughlife.blogspot.com/

 who continues to challenge people like me.  Each Wednesday she tosses out a list of 6 or 12 words to tease writers like me.  Check it out. 

Pfffit vs. Groomer

 

From the window of "Purrrfect Grooming",  Gretta groaned as Mrs. Hick lugged a heavy animal carrier containing Pfffit to her store to be groomed. 

Gretta was not happy.

At the previous grooming, Pfffit had attacked her when Gretta tried to clip Pfffit's claws.  Even though the harness had been tied securely to the table, Gretta was scratched severely which required stitches.  Gretta shivered at the memory.

Mrs. Hick had covered the cost of the injury and work time lost, of course. Mortified, Mrs. Hick made many promises.

When the door opened, Gretta greeted Mrs. Hick kindly.  Mrs. Hick anxiously assured her that Pfffit had eaten all the medicated meal served at lunch time.  At that, Gretta lifted a woozy Pfffit, which weakly batted a paw at Gretta.  Ah, my nemesis...we meet again on a field of battle. 

In fifteen minutes flat, Pfffit was back in the cage and driven away. Mrs. Hick had paid a three figures for the grooming, but it was worth every single penny.

Gretta whistled as she counted out the bills.

 Pet groomers are to be admired. We had to take our son's cat Scuba to be groomed, and there were 3 monstrous dogs (really big) in their large dog set up. Placed on a high shelf and secured, Scuba did the cat thing, relaxed and purred. No problem.

This is a Wed. Words from 2012. 

  

Fairy life sucks

 

                                                                         Fairy life

Sleep sweet fairy? Really? 

I am a man fairy, a guy who slogs through life, miserable at every minute of it.

While all those cutie flower fairies are curled up in their teacup flowers, here I am trudging along, guarding them from some unknown terror. Like anyone is going to attack our little piece of unreal heaven in the middle of the night.

What did I do before? I used to be a fairy who crafted little stuff. You need a box? I can do that. Just give me a walnut, and it's done.

But when age shut that down, well, here I am, just a bent over old fairy with crumbling wings, cursing every step.

 

                                                                         Fireflies

Life sucks. So here I am...chasing after blinking bugs in the middle of the night.

Catching lightning bugs to blink-blink-blink a bumpy path? That is a life no one never ever should have to do. Those damn bugs have no brains. Their only gift to the fairy world is their shiny butts. They die at the end of night, new bugs pop out and I, a former artisan in fairy art, have to catch 'em, lock 'em up. Mindless buggers.

When the sun comes up, those damn flower fairies will practice their songs. I'll head on to my shabby home, where my old fairy wife will make my life hell. 

Thank you, dear Fairy Goddess, for the fairy nectar fermenting into a healing liquid in my dreary house.

 
I need every drop.

                                                              old fairy couple

I wrote another fairy story, using Wednesday Words as the base, back in 2017.  This is one I never published, from 2020.

Earlier "Fairy in Mud Hell" can be found thecontemplativecat.blogspot.com . 

Community Events

 

James made a choice to do something impromptu, just off the cuff. Tiffanee always moaned about him being so predictable.  So, I’ll show her, James decided.

The local historical holidays held in their town of Brand, Missouri, were insane. Annual Celebration of Composting? Yearly Harvesting of Brussels Sprouts? Slopping the Pigs Race? Good times.

James decided that this year he and his dim companions would create a new product line: the largest sound maker known. They stole the cannon from behind the barn scrubbing it inside and out. In the dark of night, they rolled it over to the center park and set it all up. 

First, James set up the fuse and black powder taken from Grandad’s old double barrel shotgun shells.  It took hours, but the rest of the crew were rounding up odd items for the projectile. Then came the afternoon, which would be part of the town's history.

Odd stuff, indeed. When afternoon came about, the community eyed James’ creation skeptically. But they gave him the okay to shoot it off. With the barrel tilted at a 50-deg. angle, they fired it off.  The barrel belched.

Instead of being a glorious showing of colors and toys, the cannon exploded, and all were covered with the stuff from within…Hair curlers, marshmallows, mismatched socks, ping pong balls, old shoes, strips of crepe paper, Christmas decorations, and other odd stuff like crayons, with containers of tempura paint stolen from the Sunday School rooms.

James and his crew slowly backed away and took off to quieter places.  Tiffanee had assorted underpants on her head and screeched “James! We are so done!"

This is from this past week's Wed. Words.

• Brand
• Veered
• Afternoon
• Impromptu
•  Holiday

•  Unaware
• Companion
• History
• Paintings
• Solace

 The Wed. words was a challenge by Delores Oenstra a decade or so ago. Then Delores handed the baton off to Drifting through life and Elephant's Child for each week's words.Go there!