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| From Wikipedia |
A do-nothing
weekend at home occurs only because migraines have determined this. My husband John stays close, almost hovering
because he knows how bad these monsters can be.
To
entertain ourselves, John accesses a bad film.
Since subscribing to Netflix, he has discovered a whole new world of
bad, really and truly awful movies that use every cliché known.
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| Wikipedia knows all. |
How do
we know this movie is a bad movie? There
are some indicators:
It is always filmed at the same
time of day, when the sun is the brightest.
Jungle scenes are sparse on greenery,
with the same trees filmed over and over from different angles.
It has generic music that never
seems to match the action.
The film is ‘grainy’ and tries
to be artsy, like “Blair Witch…”
Hero is always a tortured soul
with a scarred past. Vague references are made to Somalia, Vietnam, Bosnia, or
Gulf War.
The
dialogue is corny, predictable, and always leads to bad stuff. Examples are:
My way or the highway…Roger that…We need bigger guns/boats/knives…Let’s
split up and cover more ground…Get the lead out…Bad-ass rebels, man…
Character
names have character, like Cajun, Poison,
or Scar. And at least one of the commando-types will
have a Native American connection with a meaningful tattoo.
Watching
mindless bad films together and creating our own withering critiques somehow drives
migraines back into the cage.
Time
spent laughing is what really locks the cage doors.
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| Wikipedia has great knowledge. |