Relationships, as
presented in eHarmony© and other dating sites, seem to happen in just a few meetings. Smiles and laughter over dinner are the
featured representations of happiness.
| Source |
The Cialis ©
commercials delve into the physical side of relationships, which always end with each person sitting in their own claw-foot tub, overlooking some inspiring
view.
Let us realize that
long relationships are not like that, not at all. Real relationships take time to develop into
friendships then attraction. The
courtship routines as shown on popular shows begin in a loud club and results
in bed. Zip—zang---see you tomorrow.
There are some
television commercials that make me smile.
Here is one:
| Long lasting love |
I do not know what or
where others are in their life long path.
But we identify with this old couple, a few decades down the road.
What about you? What do you see as you look around your community? How does 'happiness' develop in a relationship (friendship, whatever...)? What do you want for your own life?
Finding true love and a life long partnership doesn't happen in a blinding flash of light...it takes time and gettng to know the odther party. Rushing into things based on one or two weeks of amazing dates will only lead you down the divorce trail. These shows and ads are only confusing our young people.
ReplyDeleteThere is so much to learn about each other. Time, take time.
DeleteI agree that the vast majority of relationships happen slowly over time, but there are those rare exceptions when two people meet and a flame is ignited and they feel like they've known each other their whole lives. I know a married couple who met that way, and they are the happiest couple I've ever seen :)
ReplyDeleteMy parents were part of the WW 2 generation. Dad came home, saw Mom and knew he was going to marry her. Mom saw Dad, felt the same way. They were married 3 month later.
DeleteYeah most do take time, the ones that start fast, usually end just as fast.
ReplyDeleteThe fire extinguishes quickly in some cases.
DeleteSo true that relationships are most often shown flowering over dinner. My husband have been married 43 years and we've had very few quiet conversational dinners together lol.
ReplyDeleteSince my husband likes to watch TV while eating dinner, our conversations are limited to commercial. :)
DeleteAll relationships are like this, friendships as well as marriage. I have all my BFF's made and nurtured all these years, but recently I had reason to reflect on the nature of friendship. I've been at my part-time post retirement job for ten years now. There was one park ranger I turned to for direction and support navigating federal grants. Hours, months on the phone. When she finally stopped by my office to drop off paper work, she sat down and we chatted an hour. She's since retired and we have a standing lunch date. Last Saturday I met the township web master for the first time, after years and years of emails. Since I would be in his city squiring my grands to STEM fair, I offered to buy him a cupa coffee. When the children appeared several hours later I could not believe we were still talking. Even in my dotage I've added firm friends, based on shared interests, and shared over a substantial amount of time.
ReplyDeleteThere is always room for one more.
DeleteThere are those that I've seen start fast and prosper. But I have seen more flame out
ReplyDeleteThese days that seems to be more common.
DeleteA few decades down the road has already happened to us. After 45 years of marriage. We're still friends and help each other as much as we can. This is good. But no commercials yet!
ReplyDeleteBlessings and Bear hugs!
My husband is just that way. Why? I do not know.
DeletePersonally I want one big tub... I don't them being separated. :) For me after 29 years of marriage it's about being content sitting on the porch and watching the sun rise or the birds splash in the bird bath. It's about little things. As my parents used to say, "Don't sweat the small stuff and remember, it's almost always small stuff."
ReplyDeleteThe small moments, small giggles, things heard and to share--Those are glue.
DeleteI know couples that have been together for years before marrying and don't seem very happy. I do think you need to know each other well before taking the plunge, but there is no guarantee in anything. It takes work and a lot of luck.
ReplyDeleteSeveral books on marriage have said this too: living together doesn't guarantee a long lasting marriage. In fact, those marriages have more challenges, have the feeling they both can walk away.
DeleteReal relationships are friendships and they take work.
ReplyDeleteNever understood the bathtubs. Bluntly put, if the drug is working and you're feeling frisky, wouldn't you both be in the same tub?
The tub thing disturbs me, too. I mean, if they were in the same tub, the audience might get offended by...stuff.
DeleteI'm to the age, point, stage in my life and marriage that things are comfortable and good. It is for my kids that I now hold the eternal hope. :) My oldest married a wonderful girl, and they already have a baby (two years after getting married). Things are wonderful now, but they've had no real bumps, so to speak. I pray they make it over those inevitable bumps with God speed and fully intact as a unit. And I hope for my younger three, that when the time comes they take their time and do it right. Rushing things is never a good recipe in any kitchen. :)
ReplyDeleteIt takes a really close marriage and friendship to weather some awful challenges. I pray that for my kids as well.
DeleteI agree with you. If you want a nice long relationship, then it take a lot of hard work but it is so worth it.
ReplyDeleteIt also goes to one's approach to life and ability to commit for the long haul.
DeleteI love that swiffer couple! Love doesn't stay the same. It grows or it withers depending on how we care for it. Hard work from both equals success.
ReplyDelete...and ongoing discussions, equally heard, and mutual decisions are part of the dialogue.
DeleteI don't do well in relationships, with two marriages behind me, I've discovered I'm better alone.
ReplyDeleteEven with friendships, I'm not close with anyone and I know the problem is mine. I know I hold back from opening up, from giving....myself. Don't know why.
Three of my children have it easier, but one daughter is just like me.
Being open, honest, and giving are the hardest for any marriage.
DeleteMost relationships, especially friendships these days, take time. Though I feel like it was fairly easy with my husband, we've always understood each other well ~ I certainly hope we'll age to be like that couple in the swiffer commercial!
ReplyDeleteOne of my relatives how often did I think of divorce. I asked, "In a day? Or an hour?..."
DeleteMy husband has so many great character attributes, and those attracted me to him.
ReplyDeleteAbout the commercial, I just don't know.