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Friday, December 29, 2023

When I was young

 Pinterest | Proverbs, Proverbs 20, Old couples

When someone refers to me as “old person” I am offended.

I look awesome for someone who is called “Old Person”.  Whenever I see myself in the mirror, I say “Damn, girl. You still look like you are 40.” Why not? I don’t have glasses on when I look in that mirror, and fuzziness wipes out the wrinkles.

My hair has a strip of white at the roots, but Jennifer at JC Hair Studio has magic hands. My own hands look old, I’ll give you that.  When my daughter and her two daughters placed their hands in a circle around mine, you can see where my hands started out and where there are now.

I am now 1/2 inch shorter. That plus one sweet gr-daughter is about 5 inches taller than I am, heightens the effect.

Over the years, I have avoided telling my weight: Traumatic  ridicule from my brothers and my father.  (I wrote a letter to my mother, asking for her help. She did nothing.)

Telling my age no longer fits in that list.  So I proclaim:  I am on Medicare, UnitedHealthcare, and just had my 72 birthday.

Now I ask you to view my daughter and myself.  It was taken Summer of 2021. Erin is 48 now, born in 1975.

No photo description available.


Age comes and there is no stopping it. I will take off my glasses.


                                                       
 

 

Tuesday, December 26, 2023

Post Christmas Blues

 

Christmas always comes to an abrupt end, it seems. For 2 1/2 solid months, the stores have been draped with garlands, dripping bright ornaments, while Halloween candy is in shopping cart marked "50% off". Carols of all types have been playing in a loop, but for some reason they have been classier this year.

Celebrating and loving with our family is a wonderful year long fest. So, pick up all that wrapping paper, down the eggnog, and finish up all those little chores.

Here is before:

Walmart sells everything.


Here is after:

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after the Christmas rush

But, no one sees what is really left behind:


Dump site for carts from all stores
There were mountains of shopping carts tossed in the field.
After a month or so, these were all gone. 


Christmas is over, yes, but we will continue rejoicing for the entire year. No matter how strange and scary our lives are now, we will continue to rejoice. 

After all, Christmas is only 11 months and a few days away.

 

Tuesday, December 19, 2023

Good eatin' in Missouri

 

 Planning the Next Escape: The only home of throwed rolls

Old Man and Old Woman had driven on Interstate 55 many times, too many to mention.  This time they were driving from Beaumont, Texas, the day after Christmas. Christmas in Beaumont with Golden Boy, their youngest son, had been painful and disappointing for too many reasons to count.

Old Woman strongly suggested they stop and get some food.  Old Man said he was just fine, and she could wait a while.  Old Woman replied in no uncertain language that they had better stop or there’d be pee all over Old Man’s precious car.

 
Passing by Sikeston, Missouri, a sign announced “Home of the Throwed Roll”, and this would suit them both just fine, since they weren’t talking with each other at this time. 

Old Man parked his precious car, and Old Woman got out even before the engine stopped running.  By the time Old Man had opened his door and slammed it, Old Woman was inside and sitting at a table, menu and coffee in hand.

Lambert's Home of the Throwed Roll was unusually quiet this day right after Christmas which suited Old Man just fine with his failing hearing.  Old Woman could have done with some laughing and people around, since she enjoyed visiting with people on next table over or behind.

Provided by Business Website 
 
A chirpy little waitress named Patty took their order of ham and beans for Old Man, and turkey with stuffing for Old Woman.  Old Man canceled his order and instead asked for meatloaf, after Old Woman announced that she wasn’t going to ride with someone who had just eaten beans.

Plates delivered and Patty asked if they would like some rolls.  Why, yes, Old Woman nodded.  Patty called to Norman Lambert, owner of the restaurant, for rolls and Patty moved out of the way.  You’d better get ready, she whispered as Norman launched the first roll to Old Woman, who had excellent reflexes.

The soft-ball sized roll hit her hand with a WHAP, just like being caught in a ball mitt. Then Old Man caught his roll, barely containing it. Patty set a bowl of  smooth butter and a jar of molasses on their table, asking if they’d like to put some on their roll.  
 
Why, yes, Old Man nodded. Patty wiped her hands on her apron, and then burrowed her index finger into each roll.  Then Patty slathered a sizable amount of butter in the well, followed by thin line of molasses easing out from about a foot above.


Old Man and Old Woman gasped and then laughed, finally making eye contact. Three rolls later they were back on the I-55, heading home, talking to each other like old couples do.

Throwed Rolls has probably saved a marriage. 

This is a re-post from 2019 and 2022. Since that time this has been a story told to the family.  Dad always elaborated the story somewhat, and Mom always corrected the incorrect details.