Radio Host: Okay, you’re on live. How can Dr. Love help you?
Male voice: Okay…I wrote this girl a letter…I gave it to
the postman and he put it in his sack…
Dr. Love: So he put the letter in his sack, and…?
Male voice: (sobs)
Bright and early next morning, he brought the letter back…
Dr. Love: So, the letter was returned?
Male voice:
…she wrote upon
it: Return to sender, address unknown…
Dr. Love: You had a quarrel? A lover’s spat?
Male voice: I wrote “I’m
sorry!” But my letter keeps coming back…(indistinct nose blowing).
Dr. Love: So, the letter was returned....What did you do next?
Male Voice: So then I dropped
it in the mailbox, sent it special D (delivery)…
Dr. Love: And the next morning…?
Male voice: It came right back to me…RETURN TO SENDER…
Dr. Love: Same thing?
Address unknown?
Male voice: ...and, ‘No
such person…No such zone’! (soft crying)
Dr. Love: What the heck?
What’ll you do next?
Male voice: This time,
I’m gonna take it myself!
Dr. Love: And put it right in her hand? Isn’t that stalking? I mean, really?
Male voice: …if it
comes back the very next day, then I’ll understand the writing on it…
Dr. Love: I think that is best. Take a hint. Move on, buddy. Move on...Next Caller, line 2...something about "Your Cheatin' Heart" you're saying?...
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