Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Massacre in the Sock Drawer

Source
Life was great in the sock drawer.  They were one big happy family, freely visiting from the back to the front of the drawer.  Some socks had returned from vacations recently, and spoke glowingly of the glories of Fresno and Bakersfield, and other distant exotic destinations. 

Yes, cotton, spandex, wool, and nylon co-existed happily.  Polyester was merely tolerated. 

Then came the massacre, a purge that would traumatize the sock drawer for all time.  Not one sock that survived would ever forget that day when friends and family were divided, and some disappeared.

The damned IKEA product, Komplement #16635, was to blame.
One morning the drawer was opened, pulled out, and dumped onto a bed.  Some of the socks had never seen the light of day and were stunned by the open sea of bedspread.  Socks were tossed left and right.  Some were knotted together without ceremony; others were thrown into the waiting jaws of Good Will bags.

Then the Komplement #16635 box was assembled and pushed snugly into the drawer. 

Such efficiency, such brutality!  In moments, all the mated socks were sorted into their boxes, and the drawer closed slowly.  Gone were the Veterans, the Christmas tree sock, and most of all, the sage and wise surgical sock with the chevron treads.

Only a quiet sob was heard and then there was silence.

Reference:   Christmas in the Sock Drawer

24 comments:

  1. Wow, I never knew socks had such feelings. I wonder what my mixed matched ones are talking about haha

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    1. Whatever they are discussing, those socks know everything. Watch yourself.

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  2. Nothing like a good shake up whether you're a sock or a useless bra in the underwear drawer. Be ruthless woman...be ruthless.

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    1. It is the only way to hold back the tide of overflowing drawers and bulging closets: slash and burn, restock.

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  3. Fess up. You found more than socks and the bra in your sock drawer. Did you really go down to nine pair? Or, is the drawer lined with those little buggers.

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    1. No, those neat little cube-ettes hold more than one pair. Sad to say, my own sock drawer is running rampant, and I must sort it all out. I am afraid that there are all sorts of things in that drawer; a Nyquil packet popped out the other day.

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  4. If it were my sock drawer (which is due for a real brutal cleaning), I would probably have all sorts of junk in there as well. I will compile a list of my findings in another post!

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  5. Way to hinder my progress, Susan. I was set to throw out two big baskets of socks that diddn't have mates after an hour and a half on eSock Harmony. They laid on my bed together until they found no chemistry, and tossed carelessly back into the pool of other lonely onlies. Now that I know they have FEELINGS, oy vey! I can't just "up and ditch" all 231 bachelors and batchelorettes, can I?
    I have an IKEA box to house my couples; so far they are okay with not being divvied up into apartments.

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    1. All I can think is, "Those socks better watch themselves!" Those 231 socks are in serious danger.

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  6. Oh my! I'm never going to buy this evil product!

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    1. Someday, you too will be tempted to organize that drawer.

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  7. If only I was this organized! I have so many things at the bottom of my sock drawer that I don't even realize they are there. Hmmm...maybe I should do something about that

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    1. I found a dead flashlight and a Minnie Mouse watch at the front of the drawer.

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  8. What a nifty gadget! I pair up socks as I wash (and hang them in pairs on the line) so I never have odd socks, but there are certainly socks for all seasons snuggled closely together.

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    1. The most dangerous socks of all are little girl socks. They are the sneakiest socks in the world.

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  9. So tragic! Poor little guys. I never thought about organizing my socks. ;)

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    1. Put it off as long as you can, Carrie.

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  10. I had such a good chuckle!
    I've noticed that polyester is always the victim... even amongst the socks...
    Thanks for the entertainment, Susan!

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    1. It is strange--after a childhood spent in ironing heavy cotton, I thought polyester was my salvation. After years, menopause came and polyester went away.

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  11. Poor socks! Though as a person, I must say that Komplement looks rather handy . . .

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    1. Yes, it is rather handy, but even it can start bulging with spare socks and loose quarters.

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  12. "Some of the socks...were stunned by the open sea of bedspread." I love this, and I also loved your original Christmas sock story! Sorry that there were so many casualities along the way. Julie

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    1. The life of a sock is short and must be lived to the fullest. Sad, but true. Glad you enjoyed some chuckles.

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Go ahead...it won' t hurt...I'd love to hear what you think!