Thursday, March 23, 2017

From Pillar to Post

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Amazon Prime has been created by a woman, I am certain.  I can see her standing at her front door, tapping her foot and saying, “Dammit!  Christmas is in two days!  I ordered this gift from Amazon ten days ago, and where is it?  Where is it!!”

This woman has a doctorate in electrical engineering and computer design. She has written multiple programs, successful programs used by Apple, Microsoft, and all the big places.  She has written and designed for military and government. She even had lunch with Walter O'Brien.

Where is this gift, she wonders, as she grits her teeth.

This woman slams the door, and retreats into her immaculate home office, organized down to the very pencils on her desk which are sharpened and lined up line little soldiers.

She creates Amazon Prime.  Maybe, but this is from my mind.

I am waiting for a “Janome Hello Kitty Sewing Machine”.  I already have a monster Janome, weighs a good twenty-five pounds.  But taking it to my quilt club is nigh impossible, thus I have ordered this heavy duty but lighter weight Janome.

Tracking my sewing machine reads like this:

Tuesday. 3/21, 10 pm, package leaves seller facility, is in transit to carrier (FedEx).

Wednesday, 3/22, 5:34 am, package received by FedEx, in Rockford, IL. US

Wednesday, 3/22, 6:45 am, package has left FedEx from Rockford, IL. US

Wednesday, 3/22, 11:42 am, package arrives at FedEx in Des Moines, IA, US

Wednesday, 3/22, 2:41 pm, package has left FedEx in Des Moines, IA, US

Wednesday, 3/22 4:10 pm, package arrives at FedEx in Ontario, CA, US

Wednesday, 3/22, 6:22 pm, package is received by FedEx Ontario, CA, US (?) 

Wednesday, 3/22, 9:23 pm, package has left FedEx in Ontario, CA, US

Wednesday, 3/22, 10:11 pm, package arrives at FedEx in Romoland, CA, US

Thursday, 3/23, 4:25 am, package goes out for delivery to Murrieta, CA, US, scheduled for delivery Thursday, 4:14 pm.

Well done, creator of Amazon Prime.  Well done, FedEx.


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Monday, March 20, 2017

My mama told me....


While I did not dare to mouth off or disobey my mama (seriously, things could go south in split seconds), I have two daughters who have mouthed off to me, disobeyed and deceived me.  They both were told that "Someday, you will have a daughter who will challenge your knowledge and authority".

Now "the chickens have come home to roost".



I feel your pain.

Now, I smile when my daughter unloads on me about battles fought, won or lost. She knows why I smile, and has said the same sentence I said some 25 years ago.

Ah, life is good.

Friday, March 17, 2017

Raise a Cup, Hoist a Pint


Weddings are joyful (usually) events where two people make vows to love and care for each for the rest of their lives.  

Probably each reader participated in such a wedding as witnesses, family, and share in the reception. Well, actually, after the wedding ceremony, people head to food and drink, cut the cake, and then dance. It can all be pretty sedate and forgettable.

  

Riverdance in 1988 which inspired Irish Dancing all over the world
On YouTube you will find so many clips of Michael Flatley who was never a humble self-deprecating fella.

But, have any of you EVER witnessed an Irish wedding?  What if the bride and groom are professional Irish dancers from Riverdance?  What if many of the guests are are their buddies from Riverdance?  What if...





There you are, a St. Patrick's Day gift for all to enjoy a wedding done right.

Enjoy St. Paddy's Day!  Avoid the garishness of canals died green in Chicago.

  Eat corned beef (not really an Irish thing), boiled potatoes, onions, and cabbage.  Top it all of with a "trifle", which is really a British and Irish dessert.

Guinness is up to you.


Hoist a pint, or maybe two