Wednesday, May 25, 2016

It is only another a birthday--get over yourself...

My wedding cake did not look this nice!
Dear Janis,

How I enjoyed talking with you to celebrate your 60th birthday!  Listen, turning sixty is not painful, honey.  In fact, it has perks.

You were always sitting at "Little Girl" table, only you did not realize it.  That table complains about going to the gym, missing out on desserts for weight issues, etc.  Now?  Eat the damn dessert, screw going to the gym.    The Big Girl table still does yoga on occasion, but eats the creme' brulee.
  
People will/may ask you for advice about all sorts of problems.   The Big Girl can share a wealth of that knowledge beyond the question asked, when they wish you would shut up. Let your accumulation of grouchiness cut loose, and to hell with 'em.  

You  can go to movies, get the discount (pitiful as it is) and say "Excuse me" walking past lines seemingly without realizing it.  Even pass some gas along the way. 

And, this is the best one, we smile knowingly at those 40 - 50 year old women who are going through menopause. The Big Girl tells them "It will be over really soon!" knowing good and well, it will seem like forever.  WE are in the Big Girl Club and THEY are in the "Misery Knows No Bounds" Club.

Those in the Big Girl Club can ogle young handsome men, even hit on them. Those hunks get embarrassed, but we can freely look at their muscles and tight buttocks, because we are the  Big Girl Club. We are their grandmother's age, and they smile at us and we lust back. They won't "hit" on us--they know it, we know it, but we are in the "Big Girl" Club.

My dear one, there are so many joys of turning sixty.  Now, turning sixty-five really sucks, but it can't be helped. So, get over yourself.

Smiling for you,  
Mom (age 84)


29 comments:

  1. Both my body and my mind have turned recalcitrant - and I am still so grateful not to be a teenager. So very grateful.

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    Replies
    1. Nothing, nothing at all was great to be a teenager.

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  2. Replies
    1. My SIL cannot believe she is 60. She is stunned. I don't know how she would respond to a Vulcan greeting.

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  3. This fifty-something guy doesn't mind who hits on him...

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  4. Flirting with those handsome youngsters. Fun times. Today is my daughter's birthday too. It's a great day to be a woman.

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    1. I'll tell that to "Janis" when we have a b-day party at a local Native Amer. Casino, Pachenga.

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  5. lol my grandmother sure has the gas thing down, just lets it go wherever she is.

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    Replies
    1. I figure she has the right to do so.

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  6. Apparently, I'm the little girl at this party...

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  7. I have never passed on creme' brulee, and that's the best advice I can give.

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    Replies
    1. Creme' brulee, no matter the calories, must be eaten.

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  8. From the age of 25, I minded getting older. No longer, I have reached the age of "what the heck". Pass the creme brûlée.

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    Replies
    1. I figured many years ago, the "what the heck" is a good attitude to have, esp. when it comes to creme' brulee.

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  9. It's fun isn't it? Being old enough to misbehave and be excused because of our age. Finally being past all that menopause horror.

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    Replies
    1. It is fun, even if my kids shake their heads at me.

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    2. Oh, the menopause horror! No one should have to go through that!

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  10. Every age has its pros and cons. I don't mind get older, I just wish it wouldn't keep happening so fast. ;)

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    Replies
    1. You are still in the Little Girl club. But those dang b-days happen once every year.

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  11. Haha! I've been in the Big Girl Club for a few years now. And I sure would love a piece of that cake.

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    Replies
    1. I love wedding/birthday cake like this. But go for the creme'brulee, instead.

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  12. Hi human, Susan,

    My human dad, Gary, might like to be a neutral observer at the Big Girl Club.

    My human dad is way over 60 and he skateboards, plays basketball and thinks his son's buddies think he's well cool.

    Pawsitive wishes from a rather old yet frisky dawg,

    Penny!

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    Replies
    1. Greetings, Penny! I am absolutely pawsitive that Gary is a master at many sports, and no doubt that he is cool. All I do is write and sew. Sigh

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  13. Funny, but true. Life just keeps on moving forward.

    Arlee Bird
    A to Z Challenge Co-host
    Tossing It Out

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    Replies
    1. One step after another, that is the way of life. Which is good.

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Go ahead...it won' t hurt...I'd love to hear what you think!