Monday, September 14, 2020

Sassy. Oh, yeah.

Pinterest.com
I have discovered a great site for me, for I am empress of sassiness.  Anyway, the following paragraphs are from that Sassy Senior FB site:

I found this timely, because today I was in a shoe store that sells only shoes, nothing else. A young girl with a tattoo and green hair walked over to me and asked, "What brings you in today? I looked at her and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator." She didn't quite know how to respond, had that deer in the headlights look.

I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.

When people see a cat's litter box they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" I just say, "No, it's for company!"

Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, "An ambulance."

The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Have you ever noticed: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he knows when he's really in trouble.

Did you ever notice that when you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs?"

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me.

I want people to know why I look this way.

I've traveled a long way and a lot of the roads were not paved.

You know you are getting old when everything either dries up, sags or leaks.

Ah! Being young is beautiful but being old is comfortable.



Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth.

May you always have:

Love to share,


Cash to spare,

Tires with air,

And friends who care.

From Sassy Senior Society


It is serendipitous to happen onto something that is just what you want or need. This was one of those: clever with a fair amount of humor which makes me wish I had written something like it.

Stay well, work in the garden, walk in green woods, and love one another.



13 comments:

  1. Those were great! Yes, you hear your middle name and you are in for it.

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  2. Now that's MY kind of salad! :) Thanks for the laughs and the link!

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  3. Ha! Ha! Great sayings. I love the quip about the ambulance and emergencies.

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  4. How I enjoyed this post! I needed a good chuckle.

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  5. Some absolute (and totally truthful) gems. It wasn't my middle name that spelled trouble to me - but the full use of my first. To the extent that I DO NOT USE the unabbreviated version. I went to some lengths to get my passport in the shortened version, which is also the way I vote, pay taxes...

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  7. Oh, I LOVE these, Susan. I laughed at them all but especially liked the one about the cat and the litter box. Thanks for the laughs today.

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  8. That last prayer is basically the ending of mine every day...

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  9. Those were funny. I'm slowly coming up on bragging about my age. I'm not quite there yet, but I can see it in the offing.

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  10. Those are fun. A lady i knew who had a horrible chronic health problem and had undergone 30+ surgeries always said that in the blank where they ask for a number to call in case of emergency, just put 911. After all, they are really wanting someone to call besides you to yell at if the bill doesn't get paid on time.

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  11. this was amusing and thoughtful too indeed

    i loved most the line that says youth is beautiful but being old is comfortable :)
    believe it or not i look forward it dear Susan and i am so glad i am finally :)
    hugs!

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  12. These are all fun but I especially love the cartoon!

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