Tuesday, April 7, 2020

The Eggs not Found


vintage Easter basket // woven wicker natural and pink and green Easter decoration 1960s 1950s
Source etsy
This event was before the Superman Travesty, back before I knew just how low and evil my brothers were, and would become.

It was Easter, maybe 1960 or 1959.  Church was over.  Ham dinner was eaten and done. It was time for the egg hunt.  Hard boiled and dyed eggs had been hidden in our vast lawn after we all had fallen asleep.  It was never questioned by whom.


Free Stock Photo: Whole chocolate Easter Egg unwrapped with smooth plain surface on straw.
Source

It was a brutal competition, with lots of screaming, shoving and pushing. There may have been some scratching and punching as well. There are no memories about who garnered the most eggs; the hunt was not so much about speed—it was about who was most devious. 

Then Easter was gone, baskets were packed away for next year, and deviled eggs were supper. With no holiday to anticipate, a veil of tedium settled over our farm in a pre-summer heat.

In the middle of the night, something woke me, something like a POP!  I rolled over, catching just a hint of chocolate.  Then a new smell came in waves---foul, recognizable, nauseating.

It was the distinctive odor of rotten eggs.  Rolling out of bed and looking under it, I spotted a lone Easter basket with the remains of an exploded egg.  One of my three brothers had placed it there before I went to bed. (My bedroom was that clean...seriously...even under the bed...)


Opened the window…threw the Basket out…and heard the muffled giggles from my brothers’ rooms.  They were waiting for my own explosion. 

Well, they did not get it.  I tiptoed down the stairs and slept on the couch.  The rotten egg smell did not limit itself to my room; it traveled to their room as well.

Justice and revenge would wait for another day.  I was the soul of patience.

Those bastards....


This is a post from 2015, rewritten and re-posted 2019. Rewritten and here it is now. 

My brothers (whom I love dearly now) were miserable bastards in my youth. They were mean to me most of the time. Revenge will be mine. 


36 comments:

  1. I hear you. On both counts. My brothers were SUPREME bastards. And yes, they grew out of it (mostly/eventually) and I love them dearly.

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    1. Mine did grow up to be respectable, mostly. In face, my oldest brother became minister in small churches in Illinois.

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  2. An unmistakable odour indeed! Pee-uuu!

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  3. LOL, how funny. The things we (I) did in my youth. :)

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  4. Little devils. Those exploding eggs made me jump every time lol.

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  5. I think the smell wasn't a reward for them.

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  6. Hope your vengeance was sweet.

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  7. Oh my God, thanks for giving me such a nice belly laugh. Now, I want to hear about revenge....

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  8. Teasing and small pranks I understand, but mean and evil is something I never experienced and I don't know anyone who did.
    We had Easter Egg hunts, myself, siblings and step-siblings, but there was never any fighting involved. We all collected the small chocolate eggs Mum had hidden, told beforehand which coloured foil wrapping belonged to which child.
    A prank such as the exploding rotten egg would never have happened.

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    1. Like I said, they were bastards. thing is, they always got away with making my life hell.

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  9. HAHAHA, Girls are so touchy! LOL I do remember finding some stinking rotten eggs that were not found, weeks later. BUT this is one guy who could about eat his weight in boiled eggs with salt.
    Thanks for the smiles.
    Love from North CArolina where there will be no egg hunt, methinks.
    Sherry & jack

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  10. With no brothers, I never had the exploding-egg experience! My sister, though, when tasked with looking after me while I was on crutches from knee surgery...brought me a glass of HOT WATER when I requested a drink.

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  11. And a whispered thanks to God I was ten years after my brothers and sisters... WAAAY too little to pick on like that...

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  12. What rascles. That had to be a horrid smell. At least they got to enjoy it also.

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    1. It took about two days for the smell to clear off.

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  13. Brothers ARE evil. It's in their job description...

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  14. I loved Easter Egg hunts as a child.

    Rotten eggs really smell bad. Glad to hear that your siblings got some of the smell their way.

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  15. Hi Susan - wonderful tale ... very typical of kids, and brothers in particular ... bad eggs just stink - foul and I can smell it now!! Thankfully just a brain aroma ... nothing more! We'll be missing the egg hunts this year ... take care - Hilary

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  16. Our egg hunts were fairly brutal at times too. There is nothing like the stench of a rotten egg.

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    1. Glad to hear brutality and competition was fierce in your family!

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Go ahead...it won' t hurt...I'd love to hear what you think!