Wednesday, September 5, 2012

I Am Done




I have been in brain-fog-cobweb mode for nearly a week now.  Part of it is the hot dry weather we are having.  Another part is a barometric pressure induced migraine. 

But, the main part is where I am in life.

Source:  Wikipedia    The linebackers are ready to mow down anyone who threatens their quarterback.

Being a parent has always been a definer of my life.  I am “Mommy” or “Mom”.  Used to taking charge:  Charging forward, mouth first; and then, falling backward, butt down on the ground. 
Source: Wikipedia   The quarterback controls the play


Basically, as a parent, I am intransitive, inactive, and definitely on the sidelines.  I am done.

Source: Wikipedia   You're going down, mister.

That is a hard thing to admit that my active solve-problems parenting is over. That I have been moved to second string.  Or, out all together.

My assignment now:  1. Be ‘grandma’ when needed; 2. Observe and listen; 3. Be silent; and, 4. Leave gracefully. 


Man.  For one who has been a front linesman/quarterback all her life, it is hard to become the water-boy.

22 comments:

  1. Life changes all the time I suppose, just have to look at all the different things it allows us to do or not do if the case my be.

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    1. Thanks, Pat. Different things are where I am now.

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  2. Replies
    1. Definitely a part of 'moving on' but still somewhat painful.

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  3. I loved that interval when I was not "in charge" of kids. Happy to give advice, but no heavy lifting.

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    1. No heavy lifting is great, but I think the advice giving is also out the window.

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  4. I was just saying something of the same sort to a friend last week. I have always been the one who takes care of other people, the go-to person, the leader of my pack. I have moved back in line now and soon enough, I will have to go to other people to be taken care of. However, right now, I am enjoying having some of those chores and decisions taken off my back and living a less stressful life. Letting go(of control)is hard, but it has its rewards.

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    1. So true. My parents are deceased, I live faraway from my siblings, and I am enjoying the freedom of my own time. Letting go is that hard part.

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  5. Replies
    1. Never got to punt--I was always the one in charge of the ball. Guess I will be finding out what else there is in this game. Maybe I could pick up the towels?

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  6. Freedom is short-lived. Enjoy it while you can. And I am told that the lurgies that grandchildren pass on to you are particularly intrnsigent. Be afraid, be very afraid. And put your name down for hot air ballooning or some other dream...

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    1. Good idea! Or maybe assisted parachuting? I have always wanted to do that..

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  7. Replies
    1. Hi, there! Glad they all worked together to illustrate my feelings.

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  8. And yet, to know where and when to bow out gracefully is a gift and one that many parents are unable (or unwilling) to do! I can't imagine having to let go of something I've done for years and take a back seat to everything I've always done. I admire your courage and resolve to step back, be grandma, and enjoy this new chapter of your life!

    Cheers!
    Jen

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    1. Thanks for understanding my struggles!

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  9. Dear Susan, why the waterboy? Why not become the reporter who writes the daily columns about "football" (if that's the name we're giving to the game of parenting). Or the journalist who writes the nonfiction account of the game to help others who want to know about parenting? Or the novelist who uses what was learned in the "game of parenting" to tell a story that creates a world others can enter without ever having parented? After all, you just had your short story published by Wayman Press in its book "Open Doors" and it's selling on Amazon. People are going to read you and want more. Think about it. Peace.

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    1. The waterboy reference came up when I thought of all the support crew a football team requires. Definitely not a cheerleader, but I could be someone who served in a different way.

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  10. Hi Susan,
    And as life and times move on, we have to remember we are still perhaps a discreet yet integral part of our loved ones lives. I believe you are doing your best to maintain a healthy balance. Rejoice in this new adventure in your life. I sense all will be just fine as you reflect and move on :)
    Gary

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    1. Thanks, Gary. You are correct--rejoicing in this new chapter/adventure.

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  11. Oh I'm more than happy to be the water girl........much less stress.

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Go ahead...it won' t hurt...I'd love to hear what you think!