Thursday, October 13, 2011

The Bride at the Water's Edge

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The creek was still, clear, and cold.  Dorothy could almost see straight to the bottom.  Her long gown was close to water’s edge, but she was desperate.

“It has to be here!  I’ve searched everywhere!”

The old country church bells chimed, echoing through the valley and along the bluffs.  Time was against her.

“Stupid!  How could I have been so stupid?”  Dorothy muttered, looking down at her bare ring finger.  Going for an early morning swim with her old flame, Jack, on the day before the wedding?  Here, where she and Jack had spent many passionate hours?

There, a sparkle!  In the deep end, Dorothy thought she could see a sparkle.

“Looking for this?”  A sarcastic voice sounded behind her.  Dorothy spun around to see her fiancé David.  He held up the ring for just a moment, and then flung it into the dark water.  “Here, go get it, slut!”

David turned and strode away.

Dorothy gazed numbly at his back, and then at the sinking ring.  Tearing off the veil and taking a deep breath, Debbie Dorothy dove into the water.  ‘$30,000!  That ring is worth $30,000!  What was he thinking!” 

p.s.  This is the second Bride story.  This is more how I think.  Susan

8 comments:

  1. haha that was less lovey dovey then before, geez a little slut and a thirty grand ring, heck I'd dive in for it too..haha

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  2. Yup...if you've lost the rich guy you can at least reclaim the ring.

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  3. Even though I loved your last bride's story, this one is even better. It starts my morning off with a laugh. You go girl, get that ring.

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  4. I wrote a similar story about a bride who cheated, but yours has a great spine chilling end to it. This would make a great book! Will you continue it....I want to read more!
    Blessings, Joanne

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  5. Dear Susan, it is clear that you have a rich tapestry of stories within you. Such an imagination. I wonder if you've written a novel. Possibly a mystery novel for you are so able to build suspense with few words.

    Peace.

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  6. Oh yes! I like the spirit in this one!
    Lx

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  7. Dear Susan, thank you for visiting my convent posting today and commenting. Those words she said to me were profound. I've never forgotten them.

    Nor have I forgotten her use of the word "intrinsic." I didn't understand exactly what it meant when she said it and later looked it up in the novitiate dictionary. She was so right!

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  8. HAHA, love it - loose the guy but not the ring - priceless.

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Go ahead...it won' t hurt...I'd love to hear what you think!